Movie Night

I now know why my dad always teared up at Disney movies.  

I have always been an emotional movie / TV watcher and have probably cried at every single Disney movie known to man.  But I remember growing up and watching them next to my dad and looking up to find him with tears in his eyes as well.  He would always hug me and hold me until I stopped crying and got into the rest of the movie.

I always figured it was because it reminded him of his mom and dad, who he lost in his early 40's (way too young, I now realize) or maybe the sheer fact that some of these flicks are heart wrenching and to this day, I can't watch Fox and the Hound without becoming a complete mess.

Either way, I never questioned it...until tonight.

This has been a little bit of a busy, crazy week and when I found out that Scott wouldn't be in town Friday night, I posed a movie night to both girls and offered to do an early dinner, Lion King, and popcorn.  Of course, they were ecstatic - Elizabeth being excited for real and Rachel just going along with her sister.  

Of course, I didn't realize that Red Box didn't have Lion King and that I would have to buy it for full price with no coupon (*double shudder*) but in we marched to Target and Elizabeth grabbed that puppy right off the shelf and even let her little sister hold it for a couple aisles...I mean, she was that excited.

Daddy and daughter movie date - this is one of my favorite pictures.  Something about his expression and her feet...

Scott had taken Elizabeth to see it when it was in the theaters a couple weeks back and she really enjoyed it - but we weren't sure how much she really got of it, as the whole first movie experience had her on sensory overload.  So I wasn't really sure what I had gotten myself into as I snuggled in between my two little pajama buddies with their blankets and bowls of popcorn.

I was so into the girls enjoying the movie and seeing it again after so long that I missed the first quiver in Elizabeth's voice when she asked me what happened to Mufassa.  I tried to explain to her that the stampede had run him over and he had died but when she turned and looked at me with crocodile tears filling her eyes, I stopped short.  

I have seen my child cry many times - from the moment she was born to the tantrum she threw today over me making her stop playing a computer game.  But I had never, until that moment, seen her cry because something was sad to her.

And it broke my heart.

I wrapped her up in my arms and rubbed her back as she dried her tears and I felt a few fall down my cheek to join hers.  I knew then why my dad always cried at Disney movies.

Because his child was sad and that just wrecks a parent's heart.

wow...

Of course, the moment was quickly over as Rachel had finished her popcorn and lost all interest in the movie and was holding onto the back of the couch, jumping with all her might.  So when Simba went  to live with Timone and Pumba, Rachel went to bed and I enjoyed the rest of the movie with my big girl.  

Funny how this parenting thing teaches me and humbles me daily...I'm guessing it's probably not going to stop any time soon...

Have a great weekend!

Raising a Boy - my husband's opinions

It's already started with my husband: The fear that being the youngest son, coming after two older sisters will wussify his only male offspring beyond belief.

You can hardly blame him - living in this house full of estrogen.  Butch has been his only male counter-part for so long, and he's hardly what you would call a masculine beast.  In fact, it's Elizabeth who takes great joy in "helping Daddy shave," standing on the toilet and rummaging through his toiletry bag, which she refers to as his purse.  

Of course, he loves the time with her, even though it's not without it's moments - one of my favorite being when she said, "Oh sorry, Daddy...I dropped your toofbrush in the potty." 

So yeah...he's a little excited.  And the excitement has brought out all of his opinions about raising a man.  Those of you who know my husband or have spend any time in the Man Cave will appreciate his sentiments.  

But anyone who has witnessed him with his daughters will know that, at the sight of this little guy, he will turn directly to mush.  However, the next 19 weeks or so should prove interesting in our preparation. 

For example...

Yesterday, we inherited a cribbing set from a friend and it is adorable.  So I was telling Scott about my excitement over this cute bedding and he just blankly stared at me.

"Are we really going for cute here?  I mean, does he even need a cribbing set?"

Then it was my turn to stare.

*****

I was also making a list of things to look for at consignment sales and, knowing he is going to be a March baby, I was going to add a couple of the zip up blanket sleepers to the list.  All of my Sleep Sacks are pink and I think they are a must-haves.

"Oh, he won't need those," Scott said.  "He's a boy."

"He is going to need a blanket," I retorted.  "Just because he's a boy doesn't mean he won't get cold."

"Really?  Are we just looking to wuss him out right off the bat??"

*****

Last night, while watching the CMA's, Scott informed me that his son didn't need to listen to the little kid CD's that I play in the car for the girls.  A woman I worked with before Elizabeth was born told me to play CD's of the shows or movies they watch in the car - something about making them cue a visual image to what they were hearing was good for their brains.  Her son had offers at Ivy League schools, so I took her advice to heart and never complained about listening to little kids songs.

But apparently, my son won't need those.

I said, "Do you have a complaint about the girls' cognitive progression?" 

He said, "No...I just think a boy can listen to the radio.  We don't need a whole lot of singing and dancing."

*****

While we were at a consignment sale last weekend, he caught me looking at a bassinet.  We sold our pack and play in a yard sale before we moved and I wasn't in love with it anyway and just figured if we got pregnant again, we'd just get a new one.  I had never considered a bassinet, but it was nice and I was thinking maybe it would serve the same purpose as the topper you get on a pack and play.

"What are you looking at that for?"  he asked.  "We don't need that."

"Well, we are going to need a place for him to sleep," I answered.

"We have the basket."

We have a Moses basket that we put both girls in because the bassinet feature was flimsy on the pack and play and didn't have a solid surface on the bottom.  I was honestly hoping to avoid it again.

"Well, where are we going to put the basket?"

"What's wrong with the floor?"

"Scott, we are not putting our newborn baby in a basket on the floor.  No."

"Oh, he'll be fine."

A woman overhearing us chuckled out loud and I felt obligated to inform her that this was his first son...after two girls. She nodded, understanding entirely.

*****

My friends, the list goes on.

"You need to look for a new diaper bag because you don't need to carry our son's stuff in that one."  My current diaper bag has blue, green, gray and yellow hearts on it.  Luckily, I found a camo one that also has a place to hold sippies on the side - which was on my wish list anyway.  Situation = resolved.

"He won't need that many toys or clothes...you can just leave him in his diaper.  The toughness training needs to start early."

"I'm going to need to cut down that tree in the backyard and pull out the lilac bush and those two shrubs.  A boy is going to need more room out there." 

And my absolute favorite:  "Do you think they make little baby Kettle Bells?"

Oy vay.

Did I mention that my husband is excited to have a son??

We went through a similar process before Elizabeth was born - laying out what we thought and what we'd do and (even funnier now) what we'd NEVER do.  My mom loves to remind me that I said that I would never put a DVD player in the car for our kids.  Yeah, I know...open mouth, insert foot.  And adding a boy to our brood is a little like starting over, but in an exciting way.  I think he'll round us out and complete our family in a way that only God has planned...no matter if we mess up raising him.

Here's to the adventure!

Praying for Opportunities to Do Good

You know, I think everyone probably blogs for different reasons.  I originally started out keeping one to update our family and friends who live far away on the girls and their progress.  It was easier for me to share pics and stories this way.  When I started Mama Wants..., I was missing coaching and talking about physical training and eventually the two kind of molded into one.

I have to tell you that I am a writer at heart and have always loved to record thoughts and stories - so this has been an outlet for that as well.  So please know that posts like this one are one of those that I am just so compelled to write because maybe SOMEONE else can identify with it.

And maybe that someone is you...who knows...

It was a couple years ago now, but I asked Scott to go to Target right after church so I could take advantage on a deal on razor blades.  I'm a big couponer, and razor blades can be pretty pricey when your husband is a full-head shaver, so he was gracious enough to take me and wait in the car with the girls while I ran in. 

Waiting in line, I was focused on getting the deal right (double checking my coupons against what I had picked up), but I couldn't help but notice the girl in front of me checking out.  She only had a few items and they weren't what I would call extravagant.  Some canned fruit, a box of mac and cheese, shampoo, deodorant...that kind of stuff.  And it wasn't fancy shampoo either, it was probably Suave or something similar.  It was obvious she was getting the necessities.  Well, the total rang up and she didn't enough money to get all of it.  So she had to do the pain-staking task of picking what was most necessary out of the necessities.  As she took her bags, I saw her get on her phone in tears.

It wasn't until I paid for the razor blades and she was already out the door that it hit me. 

You could have paid for that.  I bet it wasn't even $10.  You can afford $10.

Shame washed over me.  Why didn't I think about that sooner?  We didn't have a lot of money, but I could have picked up what she couldn't...regardless that I didn't know her.  I ran outside looking for her, but didn't see her.  I was thinking maybe I could just give her some cash to go back in to get the rest...  I was crying by the time I got in the car, telling Scott about how I didn't think quick enough...how I missed out on an opportunity to help someone who needed help.  On the way home, I prayed one of the most sincerest prayers of: Please help me recognize opportunities to give sooner.  Forgive me for being too late on that girl.

Now I tell you this not to now brag about all the times I've been able to help people since then...because I can think of numerous everyday opportunities I've missed.  And it still eats me up.  Possibly because I am surrounded by so many thoughtful and nice people who pick me up every single day. 

Like the other day, I had the girls in Goodwill, looking at shoes and Elizabeth was walking beside the cart.  Whenever she's walking, I talk to her constantly and try to engage her...otherwise, she runs sprints down the aisles.  You think I'm kidding...

Anyway, we were talking about the different shoes and then what we were going to have for lunch and how nice it was outside and Halloween...just stupid stuff...when a woman walked over from the next aisle and said, "I just have to tell you, you're a really good mom.  I've been listening to your all's conversation and I just think you're wonderful.  Oh, and what is princess soup?"  So after thanking her a million times and explaining how Campbell's makes chicken noodle soup with the Disney Princesses on the label and "princess shaped noodles" and how my daughters will not eat chicken noodle soup but will eat princess soup, I walked away feeling humbled.

It had been a rough morning and I was really just hoping to get through the store without an incident.  And because it had been a rough morning, I had been louder, crosser, harsher than usual.  I sure wasn't feeling like a great mom.  I needed her encouragement.  Funny how a stranger with a kind word can give you just what you need...

Had I given any strangers kind words that day?  Or had I been so wrapped up in myself to look beyond me...

The weather's getting colder for my pitching lessons and, looking at a past weekend, I was telling one of my parents about how I wasn't sure about pitching outside that Saturday.  He helps coach on their high school team and I have several kids that take from their area, so he offered to get me a double cage in their indoor facility...and line up my lessons.  And not just a couple lessons...more like close to ten.  

What was in it for him?  Nothing.  Know how fun it is to line up lessons?  Oh, about as fun as a root canal or labor pains.  Fitting people into time slots and hoping it works for everyone.  And he simply called me that Friday and said, you have ten lessons starting at this time...see you tomorrow! 

Who did I give up my time for today?  Funny how time doesn't "cost" much but boy, do we ever hoard it...

I could tell you a million of these.  How I got a random box in the mail with Scentsy items that totally made my day.  How I got another box with handmade toys for my girls at Easter.  How I have received checks for money we desperately needed out of the blue and calls when I was at my lowest.  

I'm not sure what you call that little voice inside your soul that guides you to do whatever you do.  You may refer to it as your moral compass or your Jimminy Cricket, but I believe it's the Holy Spirit guiding me in the direction I need to go.  And sometimes, He yells at me: Turn the car around and give that homeless man some money!!  Offer to carry that woman's groceries!  Tell that lady her dress is pretty.  NOW!  DO IT!!  

I pray for that voice to continue...and get louder so that there's nothing that I miss.  Keep me open and looking for people I can help.  I think that's a good prayer to ask daily...simply because it keeps you accountable and less focused on yourself and woah-is-me-ness.  And how dare I get caught up in the web of thinking maybe it will be one-sided and I might never get repaid and no one ever does anything nice for me but I do nice for others...that's the devil on my shoulder.  I have been given so much and have been so blessed.  I have wonderful, healthy kids, a warm house, plenty of food, a loving husband...how dare I look to man to provide blessings when I have been given so much from above.

Not to say that I'm not ever cautious.  As a stay at home mom, my door bell is always ringing with people asking for support or help.  And sometimes I buy boxes of cookies but others times, I feel everything in my soul yelling No!  Not for you...don't trust!  And I am quick to listen then as well.  

Maybe you would like to join me in this prayer.  I believe my life is much happier and healthier when I am looking for ways to help others rather than focusing on ways I want others to help me.  I have a wonderful accountability partner in Scott on this and we know that we are on the same page.  So whenever we come to each other with a desire to help someone - whether it be giving away something or donating money or giving our time...we never question the other...because we have been helped so much. 

Thank you for the opportunity to share this...as this, too, was being led by the Holy Spirit yelling Write!!    Good luck in your helping endeavors and please don't wait for a holiday or a specific "pay it forward" day to help others.  There are those in front of you right now!  Listen!!

Obsess much??

There is something wrong with me.  I have turned absolutely obsessive.

Rachel, obsessing over her ice cream.  Seriously, why don't they sell Shout wipes right at the counter??

And it doesn't even matter what it's about.  The other day, I got a book from the library.  I never get books for myself, mainly because my girls are little tornadoes in the library, but this was on the end of the new section and the cover was pretty so I thought I'd give it a whirl...

Why yes, that is the reality of my life...I pick out books because the cover is pretty...so, so sad...

And it was wonderful - I couldn't put it down.  Literally.  My poor husband sat beside me on the couch as I read page after page.  I finished it in two days, like a starved person.

It was Sarah Addison Allen's The Peach Keeper - I'll try to add it to my little Amazon link at the top.

So then I moved onto the living room and started talking about moving furniture around a buying a new chair and where should the Christmas tree go and should we get a clock and slowly but surely, I watched my husband tune me out.  Not that I blamed him, but I couldn't get it out of my head.

I decided to wait on the living room until after Christmas is over and turned my little brain to the kitchen.  I swear, Scott was two steps ahead of me (which is why I love him) and took care of a honey-do project in the "office" part of the kitchen for me.  I am currently still obsessing over it and will post pictures when I'm done.

We also went to a store and ordered an island on Sunday.  I know...just went and ordered it.  He didn't even question...just took care of our little children as his obsessive, big bellied wife marched into the store and picked out what she wanted.  

I'm really trying to fight the urge to paint...that could be a disaster with crazy Elizabeth and Rachel the helper. 

Yesterday, I had some monster energy surge - which may happen when your children wake you up at 5:30 a.m. (ERS doesn't DO time changes, FYI).  So I steam-cleaned two rooms before we left for gymnastics.  Oh yes...that was another thing we got this weekend.  Because I was obsessing over our carpets.  

And then I organized two closets.  And then I shredded a box full of documents with the assistance from my little helpers.  

Sunday, I cleaned all the bathrooms before church...and we go to the early service...

Seriously...help me!

Any body else?  Is it the pregnancy?  Is it the time change?  Is it the season change?  And does anyone feel like painting??

Oh boy...A BOY!

My friends, I have to be honest with you...we had prepared ourselves to have three girls.

Not that choosing is an option, but I come from a family of three girls and so does my mom.  We have good friends with three girls.  We just figured we were next in line.

And it would have been fine.  We have lots of pink things and girl clothes in every size for both seasons.  We like girls and have a pretty good routine going with two already.

And then we went for the ultrasound.  The technician was a little rushed and reflected the cold and dreary weather outside.  Scott and I were watching the monitor, counting fingers and toes, and watching her measure head circumference and look at the heart.  Then, all of a sudden, our little guy flipped over (he was all over the place...already...yay...) and we heard her say, "See this?  Here are the legs and here is the cord and THIS is not the cord.  You have a little boy!"

I do love Calvin and Hobbes and can totally envision this being our son.  The blog is about to get more interesting folks.

My stunned husband just looked at me...a boy?  And we both laughed...what in the world were we going to do with a boy??  Now, anyone that knows my husband would probably be shocked by this because he is one of the manliest men around...but that same person would also know that he has been spoiled by his little girls.

And now, to have a son...whoa...

So admittedly, we are both still a little shocked at the news.  I need to go through the baby stuff and start finding people to give pink stuff to (which isn't as easy as you might think as a majority of our pregnant friends are also having boys!) and start figuring out what we need...which shouldn't be a ton, since most of our bigger items are gender neutral.  

I'm beginning to get hit by a strong nesting stage right now and am washing windows and sorting through closets, so this news of a shake up couldn't come at a better time. 

Oh, the other news, he is sitting low (as if you had to tell me) and he was actually using my bladder as a pillow when we were watching him on the monitor, which could be a main reason why I'm having issues in the running department.  Both girls carried pretty high, so I wasn't effected as much.  Hopefully, he'll shimmy upward into open waters soon...ha!

I can't express enough how much I appreciate all of your well wishes on here and Facebook and coming along on this adventure with us.  If you have any preparation advice, we are open!!  Have a great day!

This n That...

So you mommy veterans failed to warn me that the day after Halloween crash was far worse than the buzz of after-trick-or-treating euphoria.  I swear, it was like my oldest was possessed by some hateful, no listening, malicious three-year-old yesterday.  We just had a spectacular time all day, falling and skinning knees, riding bikes too far down the road, pushing and kicking siblings...  So needless to say, the Halloween candy is getting trashed today.  I'm already done with it.  I've frozen all I think I can work into cookies in the future but clearly my children's attitude (and my drastically increasing pregnancy poundage) doesn't need it.  

Do I feel bad about this?  No I do not.  Candy has zero nutritional value and my children tend to lose dessert daily by either not listening or eating dinner, so guess who eats it?  The  same person who, yesterday, had two bags of peanut m&m's and three kit kats...  Oh yes...that would be me...  

Elizabeth Rose, burning off some energy in a productive manner.  This is one of her favorite things to do:  rake leaves.  Who am I to argue?

Then playing a rousing game of Stomp the Sister...

Speaking of no sugar...did anyone make it through the 30 days and live to tell about it?  I will share with you what I realized through the month adventure:  that I have no boundaries when it comes to sweets.  I swear, if I could just eat one cookie or piece of candy, I'd be fine...but I cannot.  So I'll probably continue to limit my intake simply because I do feel better and have noticed a difference in my complexion - plus it really made me second think what I was eating instead of just throwing everything into my mouth.

I say this as I just ate 3 mini kit kats writing this.  I swear, it's going in the trash now.  

Which brings me to my next nutritional adventure:  limiting sodium.  Do you know what I snacked on when I couldn't have sugar?  Snacks...salty ones...  Crackers, chips...these became the things that now had no limit.  I admittedly CRAVE them right now, which is a major problem considering that I am retaining water like a sponge.  So, after talking to Scott about it, I decided to take out all the obvious salty things in my diet starting yesterday...

And last night, I felt amazing.  No swelling at all.  No itchy legs.  It was heaven.  So if I can just get over the cravings of wanting to eat chips with sandwiches and crackers with soup, I'll be ok.  I'm not asking you to join me on this one because you may not be ballooned up like a pregnant whale.  But if you are, you may be a cracker-a-holic like myself.

And speaking of pregnant whales... :)

Tomorrow, we get to see our little punkin.  And I.cannot.wait.  I still don't feel it all the time, so to just know that it's doing ok and is healthy will be such a blessing.  And to know WHAT it is...although Elizabeth has given us fair warning that she simply cannot wrap her head around it being a boy.  

Yay.

My friend Susie is being a saint and is going to keep the girls for us so we can enjoy the ultrasound without pinning down two sets of wandering mitts.  I shall certainly let you know what we find out!  Thanks for coming along the adventure with us!

Halloween 2011

I wasn't really sure if Rachel would go Trick or Treating.

At church Sunday, the preschool classes were allowed to dress up in their costumes, which thrilled Elizabeth, who went as Silvermist (Tinkerbell's sidekick, who's dress was $15 cheaper in Target than Tinkerbell, and mommy was able to convince her oldest that it was prettier).  I got a pair of wings for Rachel in the same trip, but she wasn't having anything to do with them Sunday morning and ran away screaming and clinging to her daddy.

Our little fairy princess, posing

Our little wingless butterfly...expressing her feelings over the wings

Back to the fairy...this is how they fly, she said

So you can't blame me for not knowing how Halloween was going to go.

We had planned for Scott to get home a little early and take the girls around the block and not only was Elizabeth fired up about the whole adventure, but mommy was thankful to be able to use it as an additional threat to light a fire under my two pokey little puppies.

The entire afternoon had been a bit of a train-wreck.  I took a detour on the way home from gymnastics and decided to go through the car wash...which resulted in Rachel falling asleep in the car...which resulted in no nap for the rest of the afternoon.  Then we had a monstrous fight over the Toys R Us toy catalog that came Sunday, capped off with a hit and a bite and tears from both girls.  So I loaded them up and took them to the Y simply because I needed one hour all to myself. 

Seriously, we pay monthly dues and that is worth it for my daily hour.

Oh, and I was able to run for 20 minutes...THANK YOU CHILD IN MY WOMB!!

So anyway, we returned from the Y to find Daddy home and ready to go.  Elizabeth got dressed and then coerced Rachel into wearing a tutu.  Armed with bags that were gifts from Miss Frankie, off the trio went, taking my heart with them. 

See, Rachel?  Tutus are pretty!

The wings were just a bit too much though. 

Elizabeth was thrilled as they walked down the driveway, "Bye Mom!!  See you soon!!  Bye Mom!!"

The whole picture of the three of them, hand in hand, at dusk with the colored leaves as backdrop...well, it was awesome.  I watched them approach our first neighbor's house.  The girls were hesitant and I heard their daddy coach them on saying trick or treat and I also heard our neighbor gushing about how cute they were. 

Then, with the pregame jitters out of their system and the first bit of candy in their bags, they sprinted across the yard, on to the next driveway with Daddy close behind.  I watched until I couldn't see them anymore and then went inside to finish dinner.

I had actually planned a good, hot dinner because I knew they'd be cold:  pork roast with quinoa and creamed spinach.  I had everything ready to go and set it on warm and walked back out to the end of the driveway to see if I could see them.  It had been 20 minutes and I thought they might be on their way back.

Not a shot.

We had a couple trick or treaters stop by and I came back inside and cleaned up the house.  I took a load of laundry upstairs.  Checked on dinner.  Now we were at the 30 minute mark.

Back to the end of the driveway.  No sign.  I listened...nothing.  So back inside and I started some water for hot chocolate because it was pretty chilly out last night and set the table.

The 45 minute check came and went.  No sign of them.  I debated to go find them, but I really wanted this to be Scott's time with them.  Plus, I had my slippers on and really didn't want to be THAT mom. 

At the hour mark, I saw them coming up the hill.  Scott was carrying Rachel and Elizabeth was dancing up the road beside him.  He spotted me first and dropped their hands and they came running to give me a hug and show me their loot.  I guess our street is used to having a lot of trick or treaters but last night was pretty bare, so they loaded the girls up.  Literally, Rachel's bag was heavier than she was, but she wouldn't let Scott touch it or help her the entire trip and held the straps up to her chin to keep it off the ground.  He said she had to stop to rest a lot.

They bounded in the house, all three of them excited about their adventure and ready for dinner and hot chocolate.  We let them have some of their candy for dessert - and for two little girls who rarely get candy, that is a treat!    Of course, they then sprinted around the house for 20 minutes in a sugar rush, but went to bed easily and were both sprawled out asleep when I checked on them later. 

I like these little colorful things, mom. 

See!  Got one!  See!  Got it all over my face!!

I've never been a huge fan of Halloween, but this year was completely different.  I love the new traditions with our kids and seeing the excitement through their eyes.  I will gladly stay back to guard the driveway to see that moment of them running up the street towards me and give Scott the thrill of taking them from house to house.  

I hope your all's was wonderful!